Wednesday, December 09, 2009

Last night snow fell... about 5 inches and as I write this more snow mixed with ice is coming down. It is a winter wonderland out there. Very pretty. So we may have a white Christmas :) We haven't put the tree up yet ( this weekend). We have been decorating a bit. I made a wreath for our door....
we made mixed media snowmen....
and Santa. The snowmen and Santa were activities from the countdown to Christmas calendar. Tonight we were going to attend a Winter Wonderland at school but it has been postponed due to the snow. My son doesn't mind. He is outside shoveling with his dad now.
I have begun to paint/collage. I have been unhappy with the attempts so far. So I am doing it anyway. I feel like there is so much to try and explore but I feel like I have been here before. Afraid. Afraid of not being good enough. Afraid of this and that. So I am just going to feel it and do it anyway. So what if it isn't the result I want yet. That is o.k. So I have been sketching ideas, gathering images for inspiration boards and just going for it. I may wind up with tons of not so good, but maybe a few will be good. I know I am not the only one who has felt this way. So I just want to say if you are here too that it is o.k. You will get through it. We will get through it. Inner critic take a hike!


Kate England | Marmalade Moon said...

What a splash of joy, your red wreath is! And how ironic, that your son's Winter Wonderland day was postponed - by snow!

Dana, my heart sank when I read about your fears of not being good enough. About how you were unhappy with your attempts at painting and making collages.

I truly admire your work and visiting your blog is always such an inspiration for me. So refreshing. Your courage to show your work in process gave me the courage to display some of mine.

Of course I can relate to the fear of not being good enough. The voice of that inner critic or inner pessimist. One thing I can think of to trick the inner critic is to express joy, "wow, that blue works so well with the red"... Eventually the inner critic might find it's voice shrinking?

The other thing I can think of, is to work in a technique that one has very little experience or ambitions with. For example, I started taking a lot of photos this summer, and it felt so liberating, because I don't have to live up to any self imposed expectations of being a photographer. If that makes any sense?

Regina said...

Oh, I hear ya!

BUT, I think you are awesome. I love your aesthetic, your peaceful energy, your wonderful color combinations, how you work magic with paper. It's why I stopped and looked around when I found you and why I keep wanting to come back.

I guess that fear comes with being artistic and creative. We put ourselves "out" there and it is scary. Hopefully, we learn to squish out the fear and tell the inner critic to take a hike. I like that.


p.s. I love my tree. It's beautiful. Thank you for giving me a bit of your paper magic.

jacqueline said...

Dear dana, i could really relate to that fear...these days each time i get those negative feeling, i will re-visit why i want to create and start this journey in the begining. It does really help finding the answers to this questions. I will want to walk this creative path with you and with our rest of the creative friends hand in hand ~ supporting and sending love your way!

Your red wreath is gorgeous and so beautiful! You are a very talented artist! I love all the things you create! Have a lovely merry happy day and love to yoU!